Hi I'm looking for advice I met my wife when she was married to some one els she got a divorce and married me we have a beautiful baby girl now but our relation is deteriorating we argue a lot and can seem to find a common ground I feel that this is happening because of what we did I don't want to get a divorce from my wife but I feel guilty for the pain I caused my wife's former husband is there a way God can forgive me for what I did with out leaving my marriage, back then I did not grasp the magnitude of what I was doing please help thank you in advance.
1-888-888-1906
|
|
About •
Track Order •
Outreach •
Wholesale •
Employment •
How We Give •
Customer Service
• FAQ • Locations • Corporate • Need Jesus? • Affiliates • Blog
• FAQ • Locations • Corporate • Need Jesus? • Affiliates • Blog
C2:8 Christian T-shirts, Inc ©2013 -
-
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
10 replies on this topic
kaitlynn - 12/27/12 @ 7:54 PM
I'm only 17 and have no experience with marriage but my parents did get a divorce. My dad met my step-mom while my parents where still. My mom wanted to go to counseling but my dad didn't. So I understand your situation.
The bible says a lot about divorce. God doesn't really like divorce. Jesus said, "What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate," (Mark 10:9)
But there are many reasons a couple would get a divorce and if counseling and pray isn't helping, the bible has some guidelines for life after divorce. It talks of whether or not you are allowed to remarry and all that. It gets very specific. So if you felt the need you could look it up. But before you start considering divorce go to a couples counselor. Pray to God for patients. Talk to your wife about how you both want to go about this without it resulting in divorce.
You feel bad for the x- husband. have you considered talking to him? Maybe talk to him about your conflict with yourself and would like his forgiveness? I think you should mention this to your wife also.
Ask God for forgiveness and he will forgive you.
The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him;
<< Daniel 9:8
I hope I helped. God bless you both and I will pray for you.
Stephanie - 12/27/12 @ 8:43 PM
Love her the way Christ loved the church. Become a servant to her. Christ came not to be served but to serve. Build a foundation on Christ and His word. Is your wife a believer? If so, (and also if not) I would say that you suggest doing a Bible study together, and then you take the lead in initiating and leading it. I would also suggest marriage counseling. You need to be completely open and honest with your counselor about how the relationship started and the issues you are having now. I would strongly suggest Christian marriage counseling as well as possibly considering maybe someone who is a leader in your church?
Joe - 1/4/13 @ 7:23 PM
Kaitynn and Stephanie thank you for your advice please pray for my family thank you ones more !!!!
Sarah - 1/5/13 @ 9:12 AM
I totally agree with Stephanie (and Kaitlynn). God may not have liked it when your wife divorced her ex to marry you, but two wrongs don't make a right! Get counselling, study the Bible, pray for your marriage, be open, seek forgiveness, become a servant, and resolve to love your wife unconditionally and to never, ever leave her!
I have no idea which episode it was, but a few months ago my boyfriend was listening to Focus on the Family and the discussion was on divorce; anyway, the guest speaker said that his wife once told him, "You can leave, but I'm coming with you!" That has become our mantra (We're still dating, but for all intents and purposes we might as well be engaged), and I believe that should be the motto of every married couple--you're free to leave, but I'm coming with you. After all, when you married her, you became one person together. You now belong to each other.
KingsKid2 - 1/6/13 @ 9:55 AM
I really agree with all three posts on this topic. Really seek the Lord, Joe. He will guide you. Be willing to deny yourself, what you want, and go against what you might feel sometimes. Love your wife and be a servant to her. Talk to someone that you trust, someone at church or go to a Christian marriage counselor. The Lord will lead you as you look to Him.
Alpha - 1/7/13 @ 4:50 PM
You both sound like horrible people.
Sarah - 1/17/13 @ 1:00 PM
Alpha...everyone makes mistakes. That's the beauty of forgiveness--we may have the ugliest pasts, but God can make them perfectly, stunningly gorgeous through His forgiveness and salvation.
jc@JCalways - 1/24/13 @ 4:46 PM
I was married to a woman that I loved dearly. She was divorced and had three kids, I was able to adopt one of them. Five years later we divorced. I knew she was unfaithful to me but couldn't except it.
I was committed to a mental institution and went through some legal Hell. Divorce affects everyone envolved. It leaves a hole in your heart only God can repair.
I'm remarried and have to wonderful boys with my new wife. I still struggle with my past relationship and wonder if I'll ever see my daughter again or if she hates me because of the pain I put her through.
Alpha - 1/27/13 @ 8:20 PM
Sarah, he's not looking for advice like he claimed, he already knows the right thing (im guessing he always has and went against his better judgement before). But now he's just looking for ppl to tell him it's alright and all okay; he's hoping for an easy way out, but thats just not how things work.
Everyone who tells him that God is all about forgiveness, well thats okay but thats not the question hes asking. I answered the question he's asking himself. And yes his wife is a horrible person to cheat on her ex, and he is a horrible person to enable and give her the opportunity to do so; indeed they are both horrible people.
You can make this about me and say things like I'm no better, and you'd verily be correct, or say that i'm judging them, but thats not the point.
Do you wonder why theyre having trouble? Have you thought that maybe being honest with himself and his wife about their absolute depravity is a more likely avenue to resolving their internal disagreements? Maybe they cant get along with each other because they are so torn apart by who they have become and what they've done, and when they're with each other it only reminds them of their sins?
Maybe I'm wrong, I do tend to be, but I do know that the truth will set you free. Much more so than just hoping things will be okay because you've been forgiven.
To be forgiven you must forgive yourself, and to forgive yourself you must face the full horrible truth of how much forgiveness you truly need.
just a thought, not even worth two cents
jc@JCalways - 2/21/13 @ 9:08 PM
Grace is a wonderful thing and from my understanding, Jesus thought it to be worth dieing for. We are all saved by grace
lest any man should bost...If you're are looking for a way out it's as simple as this ask God to forgive you and DON'T DO IT AGAIN. simple