If somebody asked if there is something I would want undone in my life, having sex would be my definite answer. I was a Christian then, too, when it all started, but for some reason I broke my promise to God, myself and my future husband. Well, I eventually broke up with my boyfriend because he could not bear the idea of not having sex. Now I have lived with the shame and the incredible guilt since then. I know God has forgiven me, I just find it hard to forgive myself.
The thing is, I would really want to buy myself a purity ring and now I would like to have YOUR advice on whether or not I "deserve" a ring like that. Do we get second chances?
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10 replies on this topic
Matt - 1/19/10 @ 2:08 PM
Everyone makes mistakes, so it isnt something that you should dwell on. True, it was wrong, but the fact that you regret it means that you no longer want to live that same lifetyle and are maturing as a person. I dont think you have to be a virgin to have a purity ring, but you should keep in mind that you are making a promise to yourself and others and that you arent going to revert to your old ways.
Do you deserve a purity ring? Perhaps not, but you do deserve a second chance. I see no problem with you wearing a purity ring as long as your arent being a hypocrite about it or pretending that you arent a virgin. Just make sure you are completely honest with your future significant others about your past, and if anyone asks you can tell them that you made some mistakes in your life and are changing your behavior. :)
Christina - 1/19/10 @ 4:53 PM
Get the ring! Rededicate your life to Christ and start fresh. Dont live with regret but learn from your mistakes. Everyone makes them and when God sees that you want to change your life and wait for your "true love" he definitely will honor you.
Read 1 Thessalonians 4:1-7. That definitely will show you how to please God!
God Bless, and let me know if you ever need anything!! I am exactly in the same shoes as you!
Emmi - 1/19/10 @ 5:05 PM
Thank you! It is a relief that you answered, because there is no one I know in a similar position.
1 Thessalonians 4:1-7 -- really needed that!
Christina - 1/19/10 @ 5:09 PM
Oh you are welcome!! Let me tell you, I definitely have a past, but it is not about the past, it is about who we are today and how we are living our life now that matters. I am completely changed person! So if I can do it, you definitely can do it! :) You are in my prayers!!
Christina - 1/19/10 @ 5:20 PM
http://www-rohan.sdsu.edu/~sdsunavs/resources/Purity.pdf
This is something awesome that you should do!
John - 1/19/10 @ 5:50 PM
do we deserve second chances? no. but we get them. why? because of grace. we are washed in the blood of Jesus every time we mess up...whether we deserve it or not.
The NaMez ShawN - 1/19/10 @ 8:35 PM
I am not a virgin, and I could go on and on about the terrible sins Ive committed in my past. But through Gods grace and a re-dedication of my faith, God has significantly changed me and has made me a completely new person. The wonderful thing about God is that His second chance is never ending (although you should NEVER use that to continue to sin; we have to strive to rid ourselves of all sins)!
Just like Matt said, you should definately get the ring..because guess what?! You have become a Virgin in Christ and he has dropped your sin at the bottom of the ocean! =) He has given you the opportunity to live a new life, but just allow people to know that you arent a virgin. You can share the fact that you gave that part of your life to Christ and you are saving yourself from now on. That can be a greater ministry witnessing tool than you can even imagine!
God bless!
jay.me - 1/20/10 @ 6:06 PM
Everyone gets many chances.
All we have to do is repent(stop and turn around)and confess our sins to God. When we do and we have faith in Jesus ransom, we are like new. Even if we mess up again. God will forgive us. (Ps 103:12) "He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west."
Satan is the one who wants you to keep feeling guilty. Dont.
About the ring, why not?
rEVOLutionary. - 1/21/10 @ 9:49 AM
hey Emmi!
i just wanted to say that i was in the same boat as you, and i was heavily into the pre-marital sex..and i held on to the shame, and guilt, and fear..but i came to repentance, and i still have temptations, but i dont give you see what im saying?
i def think that if you felt dirty, slimy, and shameful after this happened, then that means that you dont want to live in that lifestyle, and that you want to change wholeheartedly you know? the action that you have to take, is you have to repent of those sins, and cry out to God and not have a desire to do those sins any longer..when you repent of those sins, God has already wiped the slate clean. he has forgivin, and he has forgotten and he is gonna tell you to do the same.
when you repent, forget about the shame, forget about the guilt cuz he already has...and sometimes, we as believers can be a slave to our fear, guilt and shame, but we have to let that go as well..LAY IT ALL AT HIS FEET!!! CAST DOWN THOSE STRONGHOLDS!! Gal 5 tells us that we are called to be FREE!!! free os those strongholds..so let them go sweetheart!
as for you getting the purity ring, when you let go of those strongholds, and when you feel free, buy that ring!! and you make a promise to God and make sure that you dont give into those temptations. you are a REBORN VIRGIN!!! stand firm sis!! love you guys!
Crazy Rocker Barbie - 1/22/10 @ 8:33 AM
AMEN! buy that ring as a symbol that you have RECLAIMED your purity! and remember purity isnt just of the body, but of the heart. you are forgiven and that means God has completely forgotten that you broke that promise. you have started anew! so wear it proud! :D MUCH LOVE!!!